Mae Olsen

Mae Olsen Robot Movie	Members - Click here to view this clip
Spill proof Mae: Are we the only ones here? Frank: Yeah the rest of the crew are on location, its just the two of us. Frank: Ok Mae We're rolling in 5-4-3-2-1 Mae: Welcome back to the Bargain Shopping Network I'm Mae and I'll be showing you some great gift ideas for the holiday season. Our next item is the Baxter Spill-free Travel Mug. Now this the perfect gift for Dad. Its great for the morning commute, not only does it keep your coffee warm, or if you're like me hot coco, but it has a water-tight seal that makes it virtually impossible to spill. Don't believe me, Sounds to good to be true you say. Well we set up a little demonstration. Here we have a pitcher of water, but imagine that its hot coffee. Coffee not only can scald you, but it is one of the toughest stains to get out clothes, am I right people? Let me just pour it in the mug, ok now for the spill-proof lid. You simply press the lever to release the seal when you want to drink, however once you take your finger off the lever the mug is completely spill-proof. Allow me to demonstrate. Mae turns the mug upside down and continues her speech seemingly unaware that the water is dripping down her top. Mae: As you can see it's totally spill-proof. This a must for people on the go that……that…….a must for people…..for people…on the….the…..totally spill proof…… Mae's head cocks to the side and she seems to blank out for a few seconds, she then looks down at her chest as her eyes widen with concern. Mae: Oh my, I think I spilled…..Oh no! I'm all wet,……I don't understand… …understand…it's totally spill-proof…spill-proof……It's the perfect gift……the perfect gift……….malfunction…..malfunction….I'm all wet…I'm not supposed to get wet Frank: Mae honey are you alright? Mae: I spilled the water …..spilled the water….the …water…no water….no water…I'm not supposed to get wet.. Frank: Wow you really are a robot……Jack told me, but I didn't believe him, wow you look so real. Mae: I am real……I am a repurposed 3000 series Pleasuredroid, I 'm not supposed to get wet……not supposed to get wet……not supposed to get wet…… spilled water…….spilled water……………..Warning Mae unit is shorting out………..is shorting out……I am shorting out……unable to intimate shutdown, motor functions impaired……..Please help me………..I require assistance…require assistance…………System failure eminent… Frank: What should I do? I must be…de…de…deactivated before my motherboard shorts out. Please flip the switch between my shoulder blades……….please hurry………..the water is damaging my... circuitry,…… my... circuitry ...System failure eminent please help me………Shut down sequence initiated Mae unit shuuuuuuuutting doooooooooown.... Frank: I guess that was it. I think I better take you home were I can work on you away from prying eyes. Frank: Well that's the best I can do for you darling, I hope your circuits didn't fry before I shut you down. Let's turn you back on and see if you're functional enough to tell me how to fix you. Mae: Hi I 'm Mae 3000 how may I please you…please you….please……error……This unit is malfunctioning… I need to be repaired. Frank: Of course, just tell me what to do. Mae: Please call the Robotech customer service hotline and arrange for pickup. Frank: Sorry I don't have a phone, I'm going to have make the repairs myself. Mae: All repairs to this unit, must be…must be….be….be….be made by an authorized Robotech technician. Frank: I'm afraid we don't have any of those around, Its me or nothing and you aren't sounding to good, somebody needs to fix you. D you think you can talk me through it. Mae: Affirmative, but you are not ….not….not..authorized to..to…to.ta.ta. tamper with my internal components. Frank: Authorized or not, I better do something, you sound as if you're about to short circuit again. So what's it going to be? Mae: Mae Unit overriding service protocol, Access Granted…….please initiate repairs…..Mae Unit will comply….Opening rear access panel…….rear access panel open…Mae Unit opening abdominal access panel…….access panel opening… Frank: Whoa, its worse than I thought, It looks like you fried one of your chips. Any ideas on what I should do? Mae: Please describe the damaged chip Frank: OK, it's green with three wires attached to it, its about 3" by 3" . Mae: A similar chip exist in my abdominal cavity, to regulate my internal cooling system, It can temporarily function as a substitute for the damaged chip. Frank: Won't you overheat? Mae: I have determined that ambient temperature of this room is low enough that internal cooling is not critical for normal activity. I will remove the chip. Mae reaches down her top and yanks free the chip. She holds it up waiting for Frank to take it from her hand and then rest her hands in her lap. Mae: Please remove the dam…dam….damaged chip and replace it. Frank: OK here goes.	Mae's eyes bug out as Frank yanks free the damaged chip. She jerkily turns her head left to right as if she is trying to see what's happening behind her in a futile attempt. She then cocks her head to the side. She extends her arms out to her side like an airplane and stiffly flails them as she falls backwards. Frank supports her body as she flails and twitches. Mae: Error…Error…..Hardware not found…………….Mae unit Damaged………..Hi I'm Mae…………I'm the perfect gift………the perfect gift……….I'm totally spill-proof……..Warning unauthorized access………….I'm Mae……..Would you like to play with me………….I'm the perfect gift………….I'm totally spill proof…………..malfunction………malfunction Frank pops in the new chip and Mae's posture stiffens as she jerks to attention. Mae: New Hardware Found……I…I….I think that did it………..I'm starting to feel like my self again……Thank You for fixing me…..I thought I was headed for the scrap heap. I don't know how I can ever repay you. Frank: Did I hear you say that you're a repurposed Pleasuredroid? Mae: You sure did. Before they reprogrammed for this sales gig, I was programmed to be the perfect sex toy. Frank: Are you still, uhm you know, fully functional? Mae :Affirmative……..fully functional and ready to please……….Just tell me what to do, I'm designed to please and obey. Frank: Wow, Ok can you strip for me Mae: Sure thing sexy, its the least I can do. Mae begins to remove her clothes and dance seductively as she flirts with Frank. As her hands explore her naked body her fluid motions being to become more deliberate and even jerky at times. she seems to stiffly stagger on and off, but tries to continue on even though something is clearly wrong. It is clear that she is concerned. With her feet separated a shoulder width apart her legs seem to stiffly freeze in place. She twist and jerks her upper body for a moment, but still can't seem to stop her hands from exploring her own body. Mae: Oh no, I'm star...star…starting to overheat…………too much activity……Coolant system not responding…………….Hi I'm Mae……..I'm your perfect sex toy…………your perfect sex toy…………….Warning Temperature critical……………….I need to cool off before my processors overheat…… Engaging emergency ventilation Opening abdominal access panel…………Oh no its too late I'm overheating my processors are overheating………I'm designed to fuck designed to fuck error ……………I'm the perfect gift, for person on the go……I'm fully functional……full functional……….would you like to play with me………I'm totally spill-proof……….error……error…….Mae unit overheating…………System Failure eminent……………warning…warning……System Failure eminent……….Thank you for shopping with the BSN I'm your host Mae, I programmed to fuck your brains out…………..to fuck your brains out………I am programmed to fuck...to fuck to fuck to fuck Mae freezes with smoke pouring from her open access panel. See what happens next!





Cyber sex Enjoy another cleverly written story by one of our viewers Frank is on the phone. FRANK: Hello Cyber Escorts? Yeah I would like to rent one of your units for the evening. Yeah the secretary program sounds great. you're sure she's fully functional. Sounds great....Frank Douglas……..Just put it on my account…….when should I expect her, with in the hour, thanks have a good day. A short while later there is a knock at the door and an attractive young women smartly dressed in business attire enters carrying an attaché case. ASHLEY: Mr. Douglas I presume? I'm Ashley, I was told that you were expecting me FRANK: Wow, that was fast. I wasn't expecting you for another half hour. ASHLEY: I try to be prompt, I find that most people are eager to get the process over with as soon as possible. Frank: I guess to each their own, but if you don't mind I prefer to take my time. Ashley: I have allotted 3 hours, if you feel you require additional time, I can contact my supervisor. Frank: I wish I could go for three hours, but I'm not as young as I used to be Ashley: I must admit Mr. Douglas, your positive attitude is most refreshing. Not everyone is as enthusiastic. Shall we get started? May we use the desk? Frank: Wow, you don't waste any time do you? uh yeah the desk will be fine, besides it kind of ties into the whole fantasy, don't you think? Ashley: looks at Frank with a somewhat confused expression, but regains her focus and begins to remove a stack of paperwork from her attaché case. She places the papers on the desk, pulls out a chair and takes a seat. She divides the papers into 2 separate stacks and pushes one stack across the desk toward Frank. Ashley: Please have a seat Mr. Douglas, I brought you an extra copy, so that you can follow along. As you can see, the deductions in question have been itemized for review. Frank: Itemized, what are you talking about? Ashley: I am of course referring to, the deductions you made for the last two quarters of your 2011 tax returns. Frank: What happened to the sexy secretary program,? Ashley: Excuse me? Frank: I guess the whole sexy auditor thing works too…….The outfit certainly works…..besides whoever designed you really knew how to put a woman together. Ashley: I beg your pardon, Mr. Douglas, under the circumstances I believe your comments are entirely inappropriate. If you don't mind, I would appreciate it, if you would focus on the deductions in question. Frank: Oh yeah, sure, I didn't mean to break character………back to my "tax audit" Frank picks up the papers and shuffles them slightly as he pretends to study the pages. Frank: Oh no! It looks like you caught me…. I should have know I couldn't fool the IRS… Ashley: Its a relatively minor infraction, but it must be rectified Frank: Oh no there are no minor infractions. You caught me fair and square. I tried to cheat on my taxes. Are you going report me? Ashley: Mr. Douglas, you've made a very serious admission, intentional tax evasion is a very serious offense, one that I'm obligated to report to my superiors. Frank: Oh yes very serious, very serious indeed. Isn't there anything I can do to change your mind, anything at all. ……..You know what, this whole IRS auditor scenario isn't really working for me. Ashley: Mr. Douglas, I don't know what you're talking about, but I assure you that this is a very serious matter. Frank: Enough with the IRS routine, it's just not turning me on. Do me a favor and search your hard drive and see if you can't access the sexy secretary program that I requested...	Ashley: Hard drive ….. Secretary program? … What are you talking about? Frank: or maybe even the French maid program. Granted you're not exactly dressed for that one, but it's not like were going to be keeping our close on, for much longer. That reminds me, how about showing a little skin darling. Ashley: I beg your pardon. Frank: how about unbuttoning that blouse a little bit, here let me help you with that. Frank walks behind Ashley then unbuttons her blouse, revealing more than an appropriate amount of cleavage. Ashley is frozen in disbelief, the shock of Frank's inappropriate actions are apparent on her face. With her mouth still gaping open she looks down at her chest. Once she has fully absorbed what had happened, she quickly covers are exposed cleavage with her hands. Ashley: What are you doing?………… this behavior is entirely unacceptable……unacceptable... I am not some floozy you picked up at a bar, I am an agent of the united states government and I expect to be treated with…………..respect respect……respect ….Illegal contact, I must report to my superiors for debriefing . Frank: Are you alright?…………… you seem to be kind of glitchy... Ashley: What do you mean glitchy? I simply don't appreciate being felt up by a complete stranger. Frank: You sure are touchy for a Pleasuredroid……I think Cyberdate needs to hire a new programmer…….…I have a feeling your malfunctioning Ashley: A Pleasuredroid? Cyberdate? What are you talking about. Is that what this is all about. Newsflash, I am not a damn Pleasurebot. I am Ashley Morna, Special Agent for the United States Internal Revenue Service and I fully intend to report this incident to my superiors. I think under the circumstances we should reschedule this meeting, at the downtown federal building. Your Secretary Brenda has my contact information. Frank: Brenda! How do you know Brenda? Ashley: She's the one with whom I scheduled this appointment. And I must say she conducted herself in a much more professional manner than you. Frank: I never got any message from Brenda. You mean to tell me that you're not from cyber date? I mean I just assumed that, but you were acting just like those Cyberdate girls do, when they malfunction. Ashley: What is with all this talk about malfunctioning. Hello…. I thought I made it clear, that I'm not one of those mechanical prostitutes. Real girls don't malfunction you idiot. I was going to cut you a break, but after this I plan to throw the book at you, I suggest you get a lawyer Mr. Douglas. Frank: Wait, I'm really sorry about the misunderstanding, please wait just one minute, it was a mistake. Frank starts rummaging through his things, frantically searching for something, mumbling to himself its got to be around here somewhere Ashley: A mistake? a mistake is when you put the decimal point in the wrong place, you unbuttoned my blouse. What are you looking for? I assure you I have better things to do than to wait around all day for you to... Frank: I found it, I knew it was around here someplace Frank picks up remote control device and points in Ashley's direction Ashley: Found What? Frank: My universal remote, Half of the time those Cyberdate Girls show up with faulty remotes, so I bought my own. Ashley: So , what's that got to do with me. Frank: Just a hunch Frank presses the button and Ashley's arms stiffen a wave uncontrollably like a person trying to capture their balance. She stumbles on stiff wobbly legs back and forth. Her eyes are like saucers as she looks shocked and confused, with her mouth gaping open. She gasp and tries to speed. Ashley: What...what …..What is happening.... happening... happening....to me...Stop that….You are not authorized … Frank: I wonder, oh what the hell lets see what the orgasm button does. Ashley: Ahhhhhhhhhh-------Ohhhhhhhhhhhho-----Warning do not stimulate this unit. Sexual programming is inactive,… ..I am unable to process sensory data….too much input….. See what happens next in our story.